Mom died on 24th November 2005
I was too far away when my mom died. Too far. Mentally adrift and physically absent to be anywhere near her. She never took such steps when i was around. I had spoken to her the day before. She was just back from the hospital. She asked me when i was coming to Kerala. I said February. I was too far adrift. She replied saying it was too long a wait. I failed thoroughly. The very next day at 10.00 pm my cousin came in and said that i was to fly to Kerala as mom had taken some pills. She had done this earlier and admitted and recovered. I thought this was a repetition. Dumb till i saw her lying on the floor with a stoic face. Tears came but were only for the occasion. Most of us were outwardly insulated and inwardly scorched. Outwardly insulated and inwardly scorched. Scorched. That day was judgement day for me, my dad and our common God. It didn't happen right...it wasn't meant to be wrong either. Except for the intelligence. Too intelligent. Too much of intelligence. What's left is a choice. Would it make a difference? It would. Someone said it takes 20 years of peace to make a man and and 20 seconds of war to destroy him. My mom was fighting for 20 years and 20 seconds of peace took her life. At the least that's what i would like to believe. Who was she? I cannot answer that question. Doesn't do justice..not to me. A person who always kept in touch with her friends from school college relatives teachers from school college and in their old age who is there to be a better company. A respectable old school teacher who once told me that my mom was God prayed for her reincarnation. Reincarnation. My brothers classmates and teachers and all hostelites were there for the funeral. Others were family and friends and people from the neighbourhood. Make a man and 20 seconds of war to destroy him.
I was too far away when my mom died. Too far. Mentally adrift and physically absent to be anywhere near her. She never took such steps when i was around. I had spoken to her the day before. She was just back from the hospital. She asked me when i was coming to Kerala. I said February. I was too far adrift. She replied saying it was too long a wait. I failed thoroughly. The very next day at 10.00 pm my cousin came in and said that i was to fly to Kerala as mom had taken some pills. She had done this earlier and admitted and recovered. I thought this was a repetition. Dumb till i saw her lying on the floor with a stoic face. Tears came but were only for the occasion. Most of us were outwardly insulated and inwardly scorched. Outwardly insulated and inwardly scorched. Scorched. That day was judgement day for me, my dad and our common God. It didn't happen right...it wasn't meant to be wrong either. Except for the intelligence. Too intelligent. Too much of intelligence. What's left is a choice. Would it make a difference? It would. Someone said it takes 20 years of peace to make a man and and 20 seconds of war to destroy him. My mom was fighting for 20 years and 20 seconds of peace took her life. At the least that's what i would like to believe. Who was she? I cannot answer that question. Doesn't do justice..not to me. A person who always kept in touch with her friends from school college relatives teachers from school college and in their old age who is there to be a better company. A respectable old school teacher who once told me that my mom was God prayed for her reincarnation. Reincarnation. My brothers classmates and teachers and all hostelites were there for the funeral. Others were family and friends and people from the neighbourhood. Make a man and 20 seconds of war to destroy him.
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